Cold Embers
by allyann
Summary: Korra refuses Mako, sending Mako into a dark, dangerous place of despair; Bolin seeks Korra out so that she can try to reawaken the old Mako
1. Chapter 1

Cold Embers Part I

Korra sat blowing on her tea, gazing off into the rising sun and trying her hardest not to let her mind wander to unwelcome topics.

"May I join you?" Iroh knocked lightly against the door to the small dining hall. The air acolytes had already departed for their daily chores and duties, leaving Korra alone to enjoy her breakfast. Until now.

"Uh…yeah of course!" Korra was glad to see Iroh, happy to have someone to divert her thoughts from reality, someone to distract her. And even someone to confide in.

Since her encounter with Amon, Korra's every thought had been filled with hatred, a desire for revenge and a deep sadness that twisted her heart. Her only solace was that with Amon missing, she could begin to rebuild Republic City and repair was little was left of her life and power. Everyday she worked with Tenzin, meticulously practicing, perfecting her form, increasing her skill and pouring all her energy into mastering her single remaining element.

And her progress was miraculous, her mastery increasing ten-fold, but this did nothing to console Korra, to fill the deep chasms within her heart, left by the absence of her other bending. Each day Korra worked harder, but act day she felt her connection to the other elements, her power, and essentially her hope, fading.

"I talked with Captain BeiFong today. She says that the city is making rapid progress, better than she could have hoped for…but the Eastern district is still suffering and the damage done by the Equalists is proving detrimental. She suggested we visit the district. She thinks you can raise their spirits, perhaps assist in the repair…." Iroh's voice faded, as his concerned eyes turned to Korra, shining in the brightening dawn light streaming through the window.

_Me? Raise hope? How am I supposed to boost moral, when I'm in worse shape than the whole City. _Korra turned, meeting Iroh's gaze with her own morose eyes, willing herself not to show the tears lingering just beneath the surface.

"I…I don't know….maybe…" Korra muttered, not wanting to disappoint Iroh but also refusing to make promises she couldn't keep.

Iroh's face reflected his worry, but also his acceptance as he grabbed her hand, clutching it between his and whispering, "Ok Korra." He smiled, hugging her close, and Korra found a welcome comfort in the arms of the General. Her old friend had been by her side since his arrival, supporting her during the attack and after. He never pushed her for decisions or ridiculed her for her foolishness in confronting Amon. He simply stood by her, gave her a pillar to lean on, and aided her in putting on an air of strength and composure as she rebuilt Republic City, when underneath she was crumbling.

And now he still stood by her, her oldest friend and newest ally. And now, as she stared into his deep amber eyes, framed by strong eyebrows and handsome features, she realized how different and yet how similar this man was to her old childhood friend. And how grateful she was to have him.

As she sat with him now, she suddenly felt her face flood with heat, fly her stomach clench as he pulled her closer still, brushing his lips across the crown of her head, his warm breath rustling her hair.

Korra felt safe in Iroh's arms, safe to expose her heart, communicate her hurt, and to throw fear aside. She was happier with him than with anyone else…even Mako.

At the thought of him, Korra's mouth suddenly acquired an acrid taste and her heart cringed away from the topic. She thought back to the day of their visit to the Pole, the day Katara had failed to return her bending.

"I love you, Korra," he had whispered, his eyes shining with care and love, desperate to know that she returned the feelings. But Korra had seen past his words and into the true cause of his profession of love.

_He's lying, _Korra thought bitterly, turning away from Mako. _He has never loved me! He has Asami, and I will never be able to compete with her. She needs him, and he knows it. But me, I don't need him. I'm strong enough on my own, I don't need to steal him from Asami, to take away his love of her to feed my own. I….I can be strong enough on my own. What he only wants me now because….because now I'm vulnerable, incapable of being strong on my own? Well…he is wrong!_

The wind struck Korra's face, the snow flitting against her skin as she marched off into the snow, leaving Mako and the rest of her friends behind.

In the thick snow, the cold meandered up her body, traveling though her limbs and eventually numbing her entire being. She felt nothing but the ice, painful and exhilaratingly soothing against her skin. She lay on her back in the snow, feeling little streaks of ice trickle down her face. And for a long time Korra stayed like that, surrounded in a sea of brutal white, alone with her tears and her thoughts. And even when she arose from the snow to rejoin her companions and face the world once more, her heart still retained the numbness of the frigid snow.

Even after she returned to the City, her meetings with Mako were cold and formal. She felt the hurt, the residual pain and sorrow every time she saw his solemn face, his beautiful eyes. The first few weeks she made a small effort to avoid him, seeing him while she was touring the City and aiding in the early repairs. At first he tried to pursue her, to assist her with repairs, but Korra's severe attitude towards him revealed what she could not bring herself to say. As the days drew on, Mako began to see less and less of Korra as she evaded him more heartily and eventually he returned the efforts.

And now…the two hardly saw each other at all. He crossed Korra's mind occasionally, but she pushed all thoughts of him away, fearing the confusion and pain that accompanied them.

She focused on rebuilding the City, supporting the people of the City, practicing her air bending…and now Iroh. He had been her secret source of strength in her darkest moments. When her life felt worthless, Iroh had been there to remind her of who she was and what she was destined to do. Despite the turn of events, she had a duty and a fate. She was the Avatar and somehow, someway she must find a way to be what she was born to be. She refused to give up on the people who needed her.

Korra pulled back from Iroh, managing a smile and pulling him to his feet. "Come on," she laughed for the first time in what felt like ions. "Let's go boost some moral!" She grabbed Iroh's hand and sped gustily toward the doors, and then down to the docks, headed for the core of Republic City. Iroh smiled, happily towed in her stead, glad to see a hint of the old Korra shining beneath her current surface, tainted with scars from her recent past.

But Iroh wasn't afraid of what the future had in stow for the Young Avatar. Iroh knew Korra, knew she had the strength and will to conquer the obstacles in her path. She was the Avatar and nobody could take her spirit from her.

In a small,l dank corner of the reestablished City, a dark haired man sat on a barstool, unbathed and wreaking of hard liquor. His tattered clothes hung limply on his crumpled form as he hovered over the bar, gesturing for another round. As the bar tender pushed another drink his way, watching him warily as his shaking hands lifted it to his mouth, the doors to the tavern burst open, an explosion of light igniting the putrid little room.

Bolin skipped over to his brother, shaking him with urgency.

"Mako! Hey bro, get up! Makey makey MA-KOOOOO!" Bolin's words were met with a grunt and a shove as his brother spun on the barstool to face him. His eyes were red, scarlet veins high-lighted against his white pupils, eyes puffy and discolored.

"Wow," Bolin's eyes widened as he took as step closer to his brother, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Are you…uhhhh…ok, Mako?"

Mako narrow his eyes, shaking his head grimly and shrugging off Bolin's grip.

"I'm fine. What do you want Bolin?"

Bolin's eyes were shadowed with concern but he continued on energetically, "I just heard that Korra is going into the City today. She's gonna be doing some work, you know with the recovery movement. I thought you might want to go…." Mako's eyebrows raised ever so slightly, his eyes glistening as he listened.

"She and General Iroh are going to be addressing the citizens and helping Beifong with repairs!"

At the sound of his voice, Mako's eyes narrowed to slits, his face darkening into a twist mask as he turned his face back to the bar.

"General Iroh, eh?" Mako's voice was a whisper, his heart burning with rage and jealousy at the thought of Korra with that man.

Bolin persisted, "So what do ya say? Wanna go?"

"No!" Mako spat, venom dripping from his voice. "She doesn't want me anywhere near her and her precious General. And for her, I'm more than happy to oblige."

"Mako, that isn't true, she…"

"Leave Bolin. Leave me alone. I'm done talking." He slammed his glass on the table and demanded another.

Bolin started to speak again, but then Mako's angry eyes turned to him and Bolin glimpsed the pain in Mako's face, and thought better of it. He had only seen Mako so hurt once before in his life….right after their parents' death.

As Bolin crept out of the bar, shutting the doors and stealing all light from the room, Mako sat, drink in hand, letting his thoughts take him to cruel, unhappy places. And as his consciousness faded, Mako's eyes began to tear, the memory of Korra burning like a cold ember in the depths of his mind. But try as he might, no amount of alcohol, rage, or distance could erase her from his heart


	2. Chapter 2

Cold Embers Part II

Korra's laugh trilled through the air, drifting on the salty breeze as she danced around Iroh. Try as he, might, the General was having a great deal of difficulty pinning the Avatar down as she dodged and evaded his frequent blasts, always one step ahead of him. Her newfound air bending prowess was serving to be the undoing of Iroh's composure as the two dueled. Many of the air acolytes, including Tenzin and his family watched the battle, avidly cheering the two magnificent artists on as they preformed their best work.

After several forceful blows, both benders stood on the edge of their arena, sweat dripping from their heaving bodies, eyes trained on their opponent with deadly accuracy.

And then the deadly pair both burst into fits of laughter, all sincerity and solemnity gone from their practice. Iroh strode towards Korra, lifting her up in his arms and spinning her around, squeezing her tight.

"Try and escape me now," he chuckled, chest rumbling with the pleasant sound.

"Take a break you two. No need to strain yourself," Tenzin came forward as the rest of the audience dispersed.

"Come on Tenzin, they're kids, not old coots like you!" boomed a loud, boisterous man, emerging from behind Tenzin and clapping him on the back. Tenzin rolled his eyes, groaning as his brother slung his arm nonchalantly around him, leaning forward.

"Great show kids, keep up the awesome work, and don't let ol' cranky pants over here tell you what to do!" The man's wild hair seemed to have a mind of its own as he boxed Tenzin in the shoulder. Tenzin's eyes narrowed and he clutched his shoulder muttering dismally, "There is nothing cranky about my trousers Bumi! And I was just warning them of the dangers of exhaustion."

Bumi waved his hands in a mocking gesture, and smirked at Tenzin, continuing, "Crankiest pant I ever did see!" He laughed snatching at Tenzin's pants. "Anyways kids, a little exhaustion is good for ya. Builds character, ya know? Anyway great job out there!" he shouted as Tenzin stalked away.

"Thank you Commander Bumi. It is an honor to hear you say that," Iroh smiled, putting his arm around Korra.

"Quit it Iroh! You aren't fooling anyone here! They all know we're past formalities! Titles are full of fluff and for sissies!" He laughed, grabbing Iroh's head and locking it under his armpit, rubbing his head and mussing his hear. Iroh chuckled and squirmed until Bumi released him, skipping away, chortling delightedly.

"See you kids around," he shouted back, throwing a wave and a flashing grin in their direction.

"Well he is…something else," Korra laughed good-naturedly, watching him hop away.

"Yeah he is…." Iroh trailed off, letting his hand slide off Korra's shoulder, taking her hand in his and turning to fee her, his amber eyes shining in the mid-morning light. He leaned down until his mouth was only inches from hers, and whispered, "You fought brilliantly today. You never fail to amaze me Korra." His sweet breath tickled her skin, sending shockwaves of electricity through her body.

She hugged him, nestling her head under his chin, feeling the warmth of his body, the residual thumping of his heart after the early morning competition. He held her close, relishing the feel of her body against his, the curve of her hips and torso pressed against his. He bent his head, kissing her forehead, sweetly, gently, almost a whisper as they stood together under one of the delicate trees on the island.

Before she could stop herself, Korra reached up, turning Iroh's face to hers and reaching up to press her lips to his soft cheek. His black hair, affectionately rustled by Bumi, tickled her face as he moved, tilting his face to the side and pulling her chin up, pressing his lips to hers, electricity flowing through Korra's veins, fire flooding her face. His lips were soft and sweet, addicting and mesmerizing.

The sound of footsteps clicking off the steps in the courtyard forced the couple to stop, but Iroh still clutched Korra close, smiling down at her, his eyes swimming with delight. Korra found herself beaming as well, her eyes shining with her excitement, wanting to dwell in this moment forever. Safe and happy, finally having accomplished air bending and elated at her newly budding relationship with her oldest and dearest friend.

As she saw Bolin dashing down the steps toward them she turned, raising a curious eyebrow. As he neared the two he shouted with a wave, "Hey Korra!"

"Hi Bolin!" Korra wasn't used to seeing Bolin without Mako around these days, but she was still happy to see him.

"How are you?" she asked, hugging him.

"I'm…I'm alright." He broke away, looking at Korra, uncomfortable because of the concern in Korra's eyes. "Yeah…I'm good. But hey, listen there's something I need to talk to you about," he started, but then flicked his eyes towards Iroh.

Iroh wasn't naive, he knew that this was intended to be a private conversation between the two friends.

"I'm actually about to go get cleaned up, so I must depart for now. I will meet up with you again later," he announced to the two, squeezing Korra's hand before turning on his heel and heading for the temple.

After waiting a few moments, until Iroh was out of earshot, Bolin turned his attention back to Korra.

"What is it Bolin?" Korra questioned him, knowing that something was up by the unease in his stance, his grim appearance.

"Korra…it's Mako."

Korra's eyes narrowed and her heart pinched with the mention of his name. She turned her face away from Bolin, hiding the emotions she was sure dwelt on her face, not wanting Bolin to be privy to how she felt.

"What about him?" Korra asked, bitterness plain in her voice as she plopped down on the stone ground.

"Korra he…he's in trouble."

Korra's face lifted to Bolin's, eyes sharp with alarm. "What kind of trouble."

"He..he has been drinking Korra. A lot. He looks bad. And when Mako drinks…. He isn't himself Korra. He has gotten into a lot of trouble. I've talked to some members of the Triad….they say that Mako's been in their territory…they even say he might have been doing some work for them….."

Korra's mind whirled with the revelation. Mako…rejoining the Triple Threats….drinking. _No,_ she thought, _he is not my responsibility. I am not his keeper. Besides if Bolin can't help him then how can I?_

"And what am I supposed to do?" Korra snapped. "I haven't seen him for weeks Bolin. Besides nothing I could say would change his mind."

"Korra," Bolin's voice was pleading, pain tinted in his green eyes, face twisted in agony. "Please. Just try to talk to him…or something. He hasn't been the same since Amon escaped. But if anyone could talk to him, if anyone could help him, it would be you."

"Bolin I don't…"

"Please Korra," Bolin's eyes were starting to tear up and before Korra knew it, she was on her feet, hugging him.

"Where is he?"

A few hours later Korra and Bolin were seated atop Naga, making their way through a dirty, destroyed part of the City. Bolin directed Korra to a dusty old building.

"He's probably in there," Bolin gestured to the shabby bar.

Korra nodded and proceeded into the building alone. Inside the bar was sickening. The smell of unwashed bodies, sweat and vomit mingling in a disgusting musk that bathed the room. At the bar, a man sat, hunched over his drink, staring off at the wall, for all the world appearing to be a lifeless husk, a useless drunkard bent on self destruction via a bottle.

But to Korra he was much more than that.

"Mako," she whispered, walking slowly toward him. The bartender raised his eyes, shocked to see the Avatar in his bar standing over his most frequent customer.

Mako's eyes turned upward, glancing to see Korra standing beside him. At first he thought he was dreaming, hallucinating, but her turned toward her and saw her face, her eye. She was here.

"Korra," he whispered and then turned away from her, closing his eyes tightly. "You should leave."

"No, Mako," Korra said, studying her friend carefully. Bolin had understated Mako's condition severely. He was pale, sallow skin and lifeless, red-rimmed eyes. Grim shadows highlighted his eye sockets giving him a ghostly, dangerous appearance. His eyes revealed pain and sorrow, their depths showing just how far he had fallen.

"You shouldn't have come. Why did you?" He sat upright, clasping his drink in an unsteady hand before moving to bring it back to his lips.

Korra caught his wrist with her hand, slamming it down against the bar, spewing the drink across the counter and earning an angry look from the bartender.

"Stop!" she shouted, bringing her face closer to his, willing herself not to grimace as the wave of alcohol on his breath assaulted her nose. "What have you been doing to yourself Mako? Bolin asked me to come talk to you. He is worried about you, and after seeing you, so am I."

Mako's eyes narrowed. "You? Worried about me? That's funny because the last time I spoke to you, you ignored me, scorned my love and pretended like I didn't exist."

Korra's eyes softened as she reached for Mako's shoulder. "I….Mako I was confused and hurt…I still am. With everything that has happened, with Amon and Iroh….I wasn't ignoring you. It was just too painful to see you. After so long seeing you and Asami…and then I just couldn't bear to have you see me so….hurt and alone and…I'm not the Avatar anymore. I'm just…just Korra."

Mako turned to face Korra, fury and sorrow blended into their fiery depths. "But Korra I told you, i love you! Not Asami, you. But I guess I understand….Iroh i more important than I will ever be."

"That isn't true Mako. You have known have I felt about you for awhile now and you were confuse. Well…..now it's my turn to be confused! I don't know how I feel!" Korra slammed her fists on the bar, glaring at Mako. Seeing his face contort once again with pain she grabbed his hand, trying to soften her gaze. "I may not know exactly what I'm feeling right now, but I do know I care about you. And so does your brother. Please Mako. You could contribute so much to the efforts to rebuild the city, instead of wasting away her on this barstool."

Mako's heart felt twisted, torn by the many emotions that flowed through him like tidal waves. _She is right_, he thought as he stood up, stumbling at first but finding his center, while allowing her to prop him up on her shoulder and help him out of the bar. _I shouldn't be here wallowing in my own self-pity. That is a disservice to myself and the people who have helped me and cared for me. _

As Mako blinked into the bright light of the new day and winced, he felt his heart choke and constrict. _She doesn't know if she loves me. _And for Mako to hear her actually say it, to hear the words come from her lips was far more painful that any ice daggers she could have thrown at him. Her words stuck in his heart, twisting, burying itself into his deepest recesses.

He had to accept it though, in spite of the terrible agony it would cause him. He had to accept her feelings for Iroh, no matter how hard it was. His confusion concerning her and Asami must have been despicable for her to endure, because now that the tables had turned, Mako's entire body stung with the pain of her indecision, her refusal to choose him and only him. His mind withered at the thought of her being with anybody else but him, though he knew her love and care for Iroh was strong enough to rival what she felt for him.

In the end though she did care for him. And for now that would have to do. Friendship with Korra was better than not having Korra in his life at all.

The sun shone down on the hot city streets, only refreshed by the cool marine air. As Korra guided Mako to Naga, Bolin leaping down elatedly to join them, Mako stopped her. He peered down at her shining eyes, glistening like the deep blue waters in the sun.

"I know things are confusing right now but…do you think we could still be friends?" His crooked smile brought tears to Korra's eyes and she realized how glad she was that she had come to see him, to make sure he was ok. She had finally gotten her chance to rescue him.

"Gee that sounds awfully familiar," she chided teasingly, but then her face became somber and she held Mako's hopeful gaze. "Of course we can. Forever and always," she whispered, lunging forward to hug Mako, smiling when Bolin joined in, tackling the trio to the ground.

And despite the wounds in his heart, Mako felt better than he had in a very long time. If he had nothing else, at least he had good friends. Anything more than that he would just leave up to fate. After all, nobody could force Korra into anything she didn't want and he was no exception to that rule. Time would tell what was in the young Avatar's heart, whether he liked it or not


End file.
